Back To Work

For new fathers one of the most difficult experiences can be leaving the joys of your new baby and heading back into the office. The sheer simplicity of a newborn child is a stark contrast to the daily office grind. For many men the lure of home is constant and the thought of another week under the glare of the boss is less than appealing. To help ease your passage back to work here are some important office survival lessons that will make the transition considerably smoother.

Paternity leave: Count your blessings
No one likes a whiner, especially complaining that paternity leave is only a pitiful two weeks. A few years ago it was a measly 2 days and before that you got nothing, zip, not a single day. It will also stand you in go stead to realise that your colleagues got no extra time off while you were away, so complaining that you only had two weeks off is likely to be met with crushing indifference.

Baby pictures
Women love baby pictures, men tolerate baby pictures. For the ladies in your office there will be genuine joy and excitement at the multitude of baby pictures you bring from home. For men any attempt to get them to giggle and coo at your baby will be considered a gross violation of male etiquette and will be met with strong resistance.

The Homer syndrome
Sleep deprivation is a fact of baby life. It is a nonnegotiable. A constant. Due to this there is an overwhelming lack of sympathy towards those suffering from lack of sleep due to their newborn. No where is this more apparent than with your boss. Homer Simpson may be able to sleep at his desk, however any attempt by you to emulate your hero may well end in a P45 winging its way toward your in tray.